Sex in the desert

January 9, 2007

An Arab was interviewed at a US checkpoint.

Guard: Your name please?
Arab: Abdul Aziz.
Guard: Sex?
Arab: Six times a week.
Guard: I mean, male or female?
Arab: Doesn’t matter, sometimes even camel. 🙂


Bone blessings

January 9, 2007

May you be blessed with three bones: wishbone to dream on; backbone for strength and courage during hard times; and funnybone to laugh at life along the way!

Encounter with God

January 9, 2007

I asked God, “How do I get the best out of life?” God answered: “Face your past without regret, handle your present with confidence, prepare for the future without fear.” Then He added, “Keep the faith and drop the fear. Don’t believe your doubts and never doubt your beliefs. Life is wonderful if you know how to live.”

First Christmas gift

December 24, 2006

The first Christmas gift was God’s own. It was wrapped in swaddling clothes and laid in a manger. The gift is God. He came among us to invite all to share perfect joy without end with Him. Heaven is waiting for your answer in a lifetime. Choose wisely your answer while you can, while you may, and while heaven still waits.

Lovemaking Tips for Seniors

December 18, 2006

1. Put on your glasses and double check that your partner is actually in bed with you.
2. Set alarm for 2 minutes just in case you doze off.
3. Make sure you put 911 on your speed dial before you start.
4. Have Extra-Strength Tylenol ready just in case you are actually complete.
5. If it happens, call everyone with the good news.
6. Write partner’s name on your hand in case you can’t remember.
7. Don’t even think about doing it twice! 😉

Christmas rainbow for you

December 18, 2006

This Christmas, I wish I could pull a rainbow off the sky. Then shape it in your name and put it back in the sky, to let everyone know how colorful my life has been with someone like you. Merry Christmas!

Waiting for love

December 18, 2006

In God’s time you’ll fall in love for the right reasons, with the right person. When that time comes, the love will be worth the wait… all the longings will be ended. Then, you’ll forget you ever waited.